The picture and intro from Gary’s blog:
Celtic tradition identifies the Holy Spirit as a Wild Goose. He is the wings of a Wild God best followed by the wildest of men. I’m gray. I’m wild. Like He, I am not always predictable, rational, or safe. I believe my full life and my still maturing years of Walking With God offer both heart and substance for younger lads to consider. Now with 4th stage prostate cancer, following the Wild Goose has a different pace and perspective worth reflecting on…and sharing.

Imagine my surprise when I received the following in response to the last blog: “Hey, pal, I’m in hospice now. You kept me buoyed to the end.  Slip me off your list.”

It took me a minute to identify the source. Then I remembered Gary, someone I met only twice, three years ago, but he’s been receiving the blogs and commenting occasionally. And always saying he was going to come by, but then the cancer got in the way. He’s three years my senior.

He was working on a book, too, and asked me to contribute once. It was on “fathering.” And he and his son (or was it son-in-law?) had a ranch in Colorado for “whole family therapy.”

Gary’s was a way of talking, and writing, that was definitely “western” and immediately friendly. And though he seemed always on the brink of a story with a rye smile, he was utterly serious about his Christianity.

His blog was named Wild Gray Goose, which he explained in an intro, quoted at left.

After he sent me his “unsubscribe” note I looked up his last entry. He gave me permission to share it with you.

FRIDAY, AUGUST 09, 2013

HOOOONK! We All Have to Go Sometime

This ‘un’s short just to refresh your read of my last post back in July. The phrase is almost universal; seems to give micro-comfort on hearing of a death three or more friendship circles out, never about someone we hold dear or even know.

Let’s call it a filler that prevents most of us from thinking too deeply about eternity and how we get “there” (“There” being a place of peace, usually called “Heaven”).  It reminds me of the stupidest of all fillers, “He/she’s is a ‘better place.”  Really?  Place? And where is that?  What is that?  And, how do we get to this amorphous-but-wonderful “better place”?

Well, if you follow this blog or my personal emails, my “Sometime” is fast approaching. I make this post as a way to prod you to consider life ahead and how much you want to do to fill the “Sometime” gap.  We who follow the wild goose, the Holy Spirit, and all His wonderful promptings, proddings, and His gifts of joy know that in having to go sometime, the final leg of the journey is just a foretaste of eternity ahead.  One choice, two places.  One better, one way not.

HOOOOONK!  ‘Scuse.  Gotta go. The Wild Gray Goose has to follow the Wild Goose.  With joy current and anticipated.

That’s it. A man full of spirit and clear-eyed anticipation of where he’s going, having left a legacy as best he could, in his unique way.

It’s inspiring, really. And a flight path for all of us.

Good bye, Gary. See you soon enough.

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If you’re going to get anything done, you’ve got to decide on what it is then focus on it.

Sounds obvious, and easy . . . and would be but for all the distractions, the little things that eat away at our minutes, our hours, and ultimately our lives.

The good is always competing with the best.

The thing about focus is that there’s a whole lot that has to be out of focus. Like everything else!

Recently Anne and I watched Jiro Dreams of Sushi, a documentary of an 85-year old chef who’s been making sushi ever since he dropped out of high school. After a lifetime of daily repetition on one thing, he’s reached the distinction of holding the highest honor for such in the world, repeatedly.

The film’s producer was originally going to feature various sushi chefs but when he found Jiro Ono, his work was so far above any other he stopped there.

Only sushi is served in Jiro’s ten-seat restaurant in a Tokyo subway station. Reservation are made a year in advance. Japan has declared him a national treasure.

How has he done it? Focus. He’s performed the same routine day after day, disdaining the day off, always thinking of how to improve. As the title says, he even dreams of sushi.

In it all he’s come up with a strong work ethic and a philosophy of ultimate simplicity. His offering to customers looks supremely simple. One could wonder: How could this be such a high art form, a gastronomic delicacy of the highest order? But as in all true art, there’s so much more than we at first imagine.

About it, he says things like, “You must love your job . . . you must fall in love with your work.” And, “Even at my age in my work I have not reached perfection.”

Nor is it reachable. Always striving, he says, “No one knows where the top is.”

So far, he’s at it, at least compared to others.

Where did it all come from? Focus.

Nothing happens without it. And for great things, a great deal of it is required.

And a great disregard for many other things.

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It’s a term I started hearing a couple of years ago but haven’t much since. Maybe it’s because that’s when I was entering mine. Now I’m well into it.

The difference between the second and the first, besides the obvious fact that it comes later, is that this one’s your own. The first you only thought was yours.

You came through school, choosing classes you were pretty good at but also listening to advice on what might provide the best career. You entered that career working hard to prove to others you could do it. You made some headway getting on in life and that, too, was in part to inform others. As family came along, and mounting expenses and responsibilities, you had little choice but to keep it all working.

Hopefully you were enjoying it, but either way, you had something to prove and you were going to do it! You were on a track and too many were depending on you to even think of getting off.

Then those things eventually mature . . . the kids grow up, financial considerations stabilize some, and the job doesn’t seem like the only thing in life. That’s when thoughts arise that could eventuate into the second adulthood.

This one’s for you.

Does it sound selfish? Not necessarily. It’s really quite natural.

In a sense you’ve done your work for the system; now it’s time to make another kind of contribution . . . one that’s uniquely yours.

Earlier you hardly knew who that was. Or, you did, but had to let it go. Or new interests have developed. Whatever the case, here’s your chance. You still have your energy. You’ve got ideas, and talents you’ve not used.

You may still have something to prove, but this time just to yourself.

There’s some risk involved, but not a lot really. You’re freer now.

It’s the second adulthood: Grow into it. It’ll be good for you.

And likely for the rest of us too, as you make a new contribution that can only come from you.

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I’ve been thinking a bit about bell curves and how every one of us is somewhere on one whether we know it or not.

Bell curves are everywhere. They’ve been used to show things like the breadth of intelligence in society . . . with a few at extremes on both sides and the bulk of us somewhere in the middle. They’ve also been used to illustrate the growth of an organization, starting small, struggling to succeed, climaxing, and then gradually falling off.

And there’s an inevitable bell curve when it comes to our lives.

We grow, we find our path, we get ideas and pursue them, we get very busy, in demand, then later not so much.

It’s never a comfort to sense the peak has passed. We can get frustrated wondering why things aren’t happening as they once did. But, when we realize there’s a bell curve, at least we get perspective.

It’s another truth that sets us free.

My dad, at 96, is at an extreme edge of his curve. He was highly active in his middle years, and kept that energy going for a very long time. But of course eventually he slowed down. Whether he thought about it or fought it, I don’t know. Now he’s at peace with doing very little.

That’s just how life is. At a certain point the energy’s gone and we don’t care. But there’s still quite a bit of life on the second side of the curve when we do care. And that’s what I’m talking about.

Happily, new bell curves can grow out of existing ones.

It’s not uncommon for an organization to receive new life. With the infusion of new vision, a new leader or a new idea it can take off again, making use of the strength already accrued. It’ll also mean shedding some of the dead weight that holds onto the status quo. If those forces are too strong, the new life will never happen. But it is possible.

It’s the same in our own lives. When one area of strength peaks . . . even our main identity . . . another can be born. A new bell is established and off we go again. And again. And again.

One of the keys is to not wait until the current curve has begun its descent. The trip down is not as exhilarating as was the trip up and we can lose heart. But if it has already peaked, fret not. There’s another adventure waiting, another learning, another offering to be made.

So let those bells ring. And the more the better.

_________________

As always, feel free to tell me what you think . . . and share it with others.

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As always, I was grateful for the response to the last blog. That was the one about ceilings, whether they exist (they do) and whether it matters (not so much). It seems a topic more have thought about than you might think.

One of the comments invites further comment on my part. It was written by my friend (and financial counselor) Mark Taylor. A glance at the last post (listed at right) will reveal his full remark. Among his points is his own sense of being short on creativity and wondering if God is more pleased with developing our strengths or the areas where we are naturally lacking.

As for the first, knowing Mark, he seems plenty creative for the line of work he’s in. My confidence in him as a financial counselor is strengthened by his more conservative view of things. He’s diligent, he researches, he stays aware of his field. I, with my flights of fancy and creative whims, need his perspective and know it.

On the other, about what pleases God, first let me separate the theological from the practical. My sense is that God, being the epitome of love, accepts everything we do. That is, with the exception of sin. He is for us! And what we want to work on, our areas of strength or others that just interest us, is a decision he leaves to us.

From the practical perspective, however, it’s in finding our strengths that we learn who we really are, and make our particular contribution.

Let the other areas be developed by those that have them. I, then, will depend on them for help in time of need, and they me when the time comes.

That’s only if my talent is developed. (It’s not much use until then.)

I heard this once: “God holds us responsible for what we have, not for what we don’t have.”

All of us have something.

Work on that.

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I’ve had reason to wonder lately whether there is a ceiling to my talent and (shudder) whether I have reached it.

It wasn’t during my most optimistic week. I was trying new things and not meeting joyous success. Maybe you can relate.

From a more optimistic perspective, the ceiling is a myth. Our development is open-ended. How far we take it is only limited by time, how much time we put into it, and finally our time ending.

That’s the positive side.

On the other side, there are limits, starting with the inherent quantity of our gifting at birth.

It’s in Jesus’ parable of the talents that I find both truths: “limits” and “non-limits.”

You remember the story. Before going away the master gave out talents; to one he gave five, to another two, to the third, one.

The first two doubled the investments and were rewarded for their faithfulness. By inference, so could have the third but, making excuses, didn’t.

One of his excuses could have been, “I sensed there was a ceiling.”

The fact is, maybe there was.

Note the small phrase at the beginning of the story where the master divvied out the talents “according to their abilities.”

Ceilings! The one-talent person would never be able to perform at the level of the two-talent person, or the two at the level of the five.

On the other hand, neither would they be judged against the other person, but only against their own potential.

And likely, with enough time, even that potential would never be reached.

In other words, even if there are ceilings, it doesn’t matter. There’s always more to explore and do within the confines of our own room.

There’s still plenty of headroom.

So, back to work.

You too.

______________
Matthew 25:14-30

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(k) for purposes of disease management programs and services, information may be disclosed to any entity contracting with a health care service plan or the health care service plan’s contractors to monitor or administer care of enrollees for a covered benefit, provided that the disease management services and care are authorized by a treating physician or to any disease management organization that complies fully with the physician authorization requirements, provided that the health care service plan or its contractor provides or had provided a description of the disease management services to treating physician or to the health care service plan’s or contractor’s network of physician.
[The added “sticker” covering parts of (a), (b), and (c) was apparently the work of some very tall child.]

Here’s one for our amusement. And light reading. Being something of a purveyor of such (light reading) I’m interested in the craft. And one thing we’re taught in the craft is, unless there’s reason otherwise, keep your sentences short.

Especially if you want readers to stay with you.

You can imagine my amusement when, as Anne was getting a prescription filled at a local pharmacy, my eyes fell on a posting of “important information.”

As the poster was fairly high up and the print very small, I ventured to read just the last paragraph, labeled “k.”

I confess that I quickly began to lose track of what it was talking about. Was it my general attention deficit disorder, or just too much information to take in without a breath?

Then I realized: IT WAS ALL ONE SENTENCE! Who could follow it?

I glanced at the “paragraph” just above and noted that it ended with a semi-colon. So it too was part of the same sentence! Same with the one above that . . . and the one above that . . . all the way to the top.

Incredibly, every one of those eleven lettered “bullet points” of packed-in information was part of one long “cover all the bases till the end of the world” thought!

I’ve heard of run-on sentences; but this one could be in the Olympics.

I looked again at the title:

NOTICE OF PRIVACY PRACTICES . . .
PLEASE REVIEW IT CAREFULLY.

As I said, it was placed high up, the type was about 8 point, and anybody who would really take the time to read it “carefully” would probably still be there at closing time. Or subject to arrest for loitering.

I did notice that the rack for reading glasses was close by, so at least someone was thinking.

But I had to wonder, who is writing these things? Who approved this one? Who thought they were meeting some societal need in producing it? Where did they go to school? How much do they make per hour? Does it all somehow come into the cost of prescriptions?

For your information (and possible usefulness?) I’ve transcribed that final fragment at left . . . one-eleventh of the sentence. (Somebody should be sentenced!)

But don’t worry, this won’t be on the test.

Then again, who knows?

Maybe I’d better read it again.

“Carefully.”

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Do you get letters from Nigeria about every day I like do? They’re not always from Nigeria; other places are catching on to the supposed goldmine of naivete and assumed greed of us Americans. Personally, I find it all pretty amusing. Though I’ve never answered one (and never would) I’m tempted to respond in fun. The following is just that. (Last time I did one of these, a few of you took me seriously. Please don’t.)

Here’s the e-mail that came this morning, with my (not) answer following:

__________

THE PRESIDENCY FEDERAL REPUBLIC OF NIGERIA
COMMITTEE ON CONTRACT PAYMENT REVIEW PANEL
PRESIDENTIAL COMPLEX BUILDING
ASO-ROCK, ABUJA
Our Ref: FGN/PRE/VP/XNX/2012

SUBJECT: LETTER OF APOLOGY FROM
DEMOCRATIC GOVERNMENT OF NIGERIA.

ATTN: BENEFICIARY:
PAYMENT ORDER!!!

I WAS SURPRISED THAT YOU HAVE NOT RECEIVED YOUR FUND UP TILL TODAY.I WISH TO INFORM YOU THAT YOUR FUND WILL BE TRANSFER TODAY INTO YOUR NOMINATED BANK ACCOUNT WITHIN 72 HOURS.

I AM THE PRESIDENT OF FEDERAL REPUBLIC OF NIGERIA, I BELIEVE YOUR PAYMENT WILL BE CONCLUDED TODAY IMMEDIATELY I HEAR FROM YOU AND YOU ARE ADVISE TO RECONFIRM YOUR DETAILS AND TELEPHONE NUMBER IMMEDIATELY.

BASED ON MY INVESTIGATION I NOTICED THAT YOU HAVE WASTED A LOT OF MONEY IN REGARDS TO THIS TRANSFER. I AM ADVISING YOU TO STOP ANY COMMUNICATION WITH ANY PERSON UNTIL YOU RECEIVE THIS FUND FROM MY OFFICE TODAY.

TO AVOID WRONG TRANSFER,RE-CONFIRM YOUR BANKING INFORMATION.THIS OFFICE IS GIVEN YOU 100% GUARANTEE THAT YOU WILL RECEIVE YOUR FUND WITHIN 72 HOURS AS SOON AS YOU COMPLY WITH THE INSTRUCTIONS GIVEN TO YOU.

CONGRATULATION IN ADVANCE ONCE MORE.REMEMBER THIS TRANSFER IS CONFIDENTIAL, DUE TO A LOT OF IMPERSONATORS, I WANT US TO USE A CODE WHICH IS WHAT IS THE CODE AND ANSWER IS IN GOD WE TRUST. YOU ARE HOWEVER STRONGLY ADVICE IN YOUR OWN INTEREST TO STOP ANY COMMUNICATION WITH ANY OFFICE IF YOU NEED MY POWER TO HAVE YOUR FUND REMITTED TO YOU AS STATED ABOVE.

NOTE:YOU ARE ALSO ADVISE TO SEND TO US ALL INFORMATION OF ANY PERSON YOU HAVE SENT MONEY SO THAT WE CAN RECOVER THE MONEY AND SEND IT BACK TO YOU.

REGARDS
DR.GOODLUCK EBELE JONATHAN
PRESIDENT FEDERAL REPUBLIC OF NIGERIA

__________

Dear Mr. President,

I must say I am very gratified to hear from you. A personal apology coming from no less than the president of your esteemed country, I must say I’m humbled. Or would be, if I had not been so anxious for so long about the funds in question. I am, of course, referencing your Number FGN/PRE/VP/XNX/2012. (I do hope we are on the same page with this as the one I thought we would be referencing would end with 2013, making it FGN/PRE/VP/XNX/2013, though this matter has been hanging out for so long it could be FGN/PRE/VP/XNX/2011 or even FGN/PRE/VP/XNX/2010.)

And, yes, you’re right, I do feel I’ve lost (your word was “wasted”) a lot of money in the pursuit of this transfer. Happily I’ve not lost sleep over it, as it’s mostly in my dreams that the amount of money is real at all. But my larger curiosity, if you don’t mind my inquiring, is how you would know about my financial transactions and possible communications with other parties on the matter. Are you in correspondence with one Mr. Snowden?

I must say I do feel honored that you, the president of a large state, would take such interest in little me, as potentially substantial as my funds may be. Certainly it’s me that should be named “Goodluck,” not just you.

I will now carefully follow your instructions, so that you will be able to retrieve all monies I have wasted. Actually, after careful re-readings, I find no instructions. That is, except to say IN GOD WE TRUST, to not communicate with anyone else (due to “impersonators”) and, likely most importantly, to send information about persons I’ve sent money to.

Here, then, is at least that list (though I’m afraid, not comprehensive):

AT&T
Cox Communications
Southern California Gas
VISA
MasterCard
The Mortgage Company
San Diego Gas and Electric
HealthNet
LA Times
NetFlix
Jazzercize
Local Art Supply
Others

I must say once again that I am extremely grateful and humbled that the president of a country across the world would take time and concern to look into these matters of where I have been spending (wasting) money and willing to pursue the retrieval of these monies into my account. Please, I do hope you receive this in a timely manner so that the promised transfer within 72 hours will suffer no further delays.

And do let me know when I can ever return the favor. Who knows when Nigeria may need all of my earthly funds?

(Maybe now, you say?)

Thank you in advance for your congratulations in advance, for advancing these funds, and that in advance of all the impersonators who are certainly also advancing. 

Yours most(ly) sincerely, and forever in your debt,

Ref: FGN/PRE/VP/XNX/2012

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I learned from one who was particularly good at friend making that a great way of doing it is to ask for help.

I experienced it myself recently when a neighbor I’ve not been particularly close to saw me messing around with a fence gate. I would rather these projects were in the back instead of the front of the house, especially when that neighbor is present, but sometimes we can’t choose.

It’s not because of any one thing I can describe, we’re just different in our approach to things and we’ve never bonded. One thing I’ll acknowledge, however, he’s very handy and knows how to fix things.

I’d struggled with this gate before and, since he was out mowing, I figured the friendly thing to do would go over and ask his advise. It was the best thing I could have done.

Not only did he have an approach I’d have never thought of, before long he was bringing his tools over and instead of him helping me I was helping him! At least a little. It took a couple of hours but he didn’t seem to mind. It was like he enjoyed it, and (surprise) so did I.

The light conversation, the being involved in a common project, and (the easy part) allowing him to be the expert, all worked to build a bridge between us that was new. And refreshing. There’s been a new warmth ever since. (And I got my gate fixed!)

That was just one example. People like to help. Always acting like we never need it makes us seem standoffish and independent. It’s not a way to be friendly.

Even Jesus once asked a certain woman for a drink.* It’s not that he was without resources, having proved he could do wonderful things with water. But he was reaching out to her, starting a conversation. He asked for help. A bond was begun.

Try it yourself. Drown your pride. Become dependent. Ask someone for help. Do it today!

You’ll be surprised at the friendships that form, or existing ones deepen.

And the benefit will be on both sides.

_______________________
*It’s the story of the woman at the well in John 4.

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It’s one of the things I’ve often observed: Trinities exist everywhere. One I’ve seen of late could be called, “Me, Life and God.”

Or, if you like it with less religion, “Humankind, Circumstances and Providence.” (Just more syllables.)

Here’s my meaning:

We, us humans, are the initiating agents. We take action. We apply energy. We don’t just have energy, we are energy.

“Life” is what happens. It comes at us. Actually, “circumstances” is the better word here. Circumstances change. Nothing is static. It rains, we change plans, but we go on.

So that’s two, Me and Circumstances. When everything’s working, I hardly notice. All seems natural. But when it isn’t, especially in big areas, like losing a job, or hopes dashed, or everything generally falling apart, that’s when I realize I need help.

Until that moment I tend to function as if it’s duality, just me and life. But at the crisis moment, either large or small, it’s the third part of the equation that comes into play.

Call it Providence, okay, but that seems a little abstract. Why not just go with “God”? More personal.

When I start seeking, I find he’s already there, and has been all along. Why didn’t I see it before? Is he so far in the background? Or, conversely, so much in the foreground? Are we like fish and don’t know we’re wet?

But back to my trinity: I initiate, circumstances fluctuate, and God shows up at the moment of need.

Always on time, never before.

It’s a trinity, and one I’m glad to be part of.

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