{"id":11963,"date":"2017-06-26T22:13:36","date_gmt":"2017-06-27T05:13:36","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.hyattmoore.com\/blank-slate\/?p=11963"},"modified":"2017-06-27T08:09:45","modified_gmt":"2017-06-27T15:09:45","slug":"hanging-in-there-happily","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.hyattmoore.com\/blank-slate\/2017\/06\/26\/hanging-in-there-happily\/","title":{"rendered":"Hanging in There, Happily"},"content":{"rendered":"
\"a2005-c-Anne-Hyatt-Happy-115\"<\/a><\/h6>\n
Okay, this was some years ago, when our hair was dark and the tie was daily. Times have changed, but not the spirits.<\/h6>\n

I hope you enjoyed that last post, the one about fatherhood. I was glad, as always, for the comments. Shows I have some readers. As I thought about it, there’s one more entry I could add to the list: Stay married<\/span>.<\/p>\n

Or, better, stay happily<\/em> married.<\/p>\n

It’s something worth working on.<\/p>\n

Not long ago Anne and I came across a useful tool, a marriage growth plan. Among other things, it involved a simple exercise of each of us making a list of (1) three things I want for myself, (2) three things I want for my mate, and (3) three things we\u00a0want for us combined. All these were in the context of the marriage.<\/p>\n

It’s pretty easy, if you don’t overthink it. Writing the first thing that comes to mind brings out the best honesty. Communicating it might take a little more finesse. Sharing it with each other is part of it.<\/p>\n

I’ll not reveal everything we came up with here . . . that’s for us. Besides, you should have your own list.<\/p>\n

But I will share two statements that one or the other of us came up with and that we agreed on.<\/p>\n

The first: Our\u00a0marriage should be typified by happiness and fun.<\/span><\/p>\n

At first blush that seemed a little superficial. Isn’t life serious business? It is, and it isn’t all fun. But when there’s fun in it, it’s probably a healthy marriage.<\/p>\n

So work at that.\u00a0 (Or is that a contradiction in terms?)<\/p>\n

The other: Each person is an expressive fan of the other.<\/span><\/p>\n

Why not? Everybody needs a fan, and it’s so much easier if you don’t have to look far to find one. All it takes to be a fan is a little noticing, and a little vocal appreciation. We’re already good at fine-tuning the other. Don’t just lend a hand, lend two . . . for a full-on applause.<\/p>\n

And that’s fun, too.<\/p>\n

So there you go. Marriage is long. Or should be. Might as well make it fun. Might as well be a fan.<\/p>\n

And that’s\u00a0the first thing to having one.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Here are two quick points that could change everything. (Or maybe you’re already there.)<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[4],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.hyattmoore.com\/blank-slate\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11963"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.hyattmoore.com\/blank-slate\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.hyattmoore.com\/blank-slate\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.hyattmoore.com\/blank-slate\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.hyattmoore.com\/blank-slate\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=11963"}],"version-history":[{"count":32,"href":"https:\/\/www.hyattmoore.com\/blank-slate\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11963\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":11997,"href":"https:\/\/www.hyattmoore.com\/blank-slate\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11963\/revisions\/11997"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.hyattmoore.com\/blank-slate\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=11963"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.hyattmoore.com\/blank-slate\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=11963"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.hyattmoore.com\/blank-slate\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=11963"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}