God Only Knows

September 9th, 2016

vernon-hospital
From one of Allison’s blogs. The insight: we don’t even really know ourselves. Check it here.

Last Sunday daughter Allison and friends put together a service/celebration/party for husband Vernon, just deceased. The date coincided with their tenth anniversary, which they always looked forward to but never reached. It was in the same backyard where they’d been married. There were lots of speakers, plenty of music, food and wine. It was all very special. Among the musical numbers was the song God Only Knows, performed by all the musicians, including Vernon’s son Maki at the center on guitar, and a mini-solo part by daughter Justine. If you want to hear it, it’s here.

God only knows is particularly telling now during this season of eulogy. Why? Because eulogies are never complete.

Last week, with various people sharing, we all got to know more about Vernon than any one of us knew before. And to appreciate him more. But it wasn’t complete, and never could be. There’s always more to the person than any ten friends can relate, or a hundred.

No eulogy is adequate.

I think about my parents. They lived so long that most of their peers were gone long before them. Outside of family, few could speak for them.

Then there’s the situation where the one who knew the person best and could speak most eloquently has moved away, or isn’t asked to speak, or is given only three minutes.

That we get to know and better appreciate someone only after he or she is gone is an irony. The slide show informs and helps fill in the gaps. The praises of the person’s hidden virtues inspire. But it’s still never complete.

As the song says, God only knows.

Happily, he does.*

_____

This coming Sunday there will be another memorial service for Vernon. It’ll be at Heritage Christian Fellowship, San Clemente, September 11 at 1:30 p.m.  All invited.

*  “You are familiar with all of my ways.” Psalm 139:3

6 Comments

  1. Mabel Pittman Sep 9, 2016
    12:37 pm

    Praising the Lord for your insight and presence with Allison and the kids…..AND even more that He DOES know……the reference to your parents is so correct…..and how could we ever tell all the things about those who are now in His Presence? We’ve tried, but in that one thing it is alright to admit, we can’t.

  2. Acacia Bergin Sep 9, 2016
    12:55 pm

    As I saw your blog title, I realized was humming the song without noticing it. Mark and I keep finding ourselves humming and singing it. It was a very memorable occassion and all the speakers shared such great things.

  3. Doris Macdonald Sep 9, 2016
    1:00 pm

    Just beautiful. Thanks for sharing.

  4. Joanncokas Sep 9, 2016
    3:14 pm

    So beautiful and touching….. God bless all of you.

  5. Jack Popjes Sep 10, 2016
    2:41 pm

    Thanks, Hyatt for sharing this sad/happy experience. I’m praying for you all during this time of loss.
    Blessings,
    Jack

  6. Kathy Cokas Moore Sep 11, 2016
    1:26 pm

    I just found out about Vernon. (For some reason I didn’t receive the last posts.) I would have liked to be at his memorial at Heritage, but I know how special it was because of who he was and your special family. God be with all of you. Vernon is in His Father’s loving arms.

    With love and prayers,
    Kathy Moore